Tongue firmly in cheek

[girlyswot]

I have just downloaded this free Harlequin eBook:



From the blurb: Cutter Smith — code name: Slash — was told to keep the beautiful blonde in his sights. But as his interest in her veered from the professional to the intensely personal, Cutter knew the cost of falling in love would be high indeed. And he would have to pay the price….

Oh, joy unbounded. Though from the looks of the cover, poor old Cutter Slash hasn't so much had a falling out with a knife as a terrible, lifethreatening Photoshop accident.

ETA: On page 13 we read this helpful piece of dialogue and exposition:
“Uncle Nick will explain all, Slash.”
Gillian had assumed Cutter’s code designation was a play on his first name. He hadn’t disabused her.

So, um, is this not going where I expect it to be going? What else could Slash stand for? Answers on a postcard, please.

Comments

[moonette1.livejournal.com]

I think I'm obtuse today, but I'm not understanding some of this post. Is this a real story? Cutter Slash? Come on. And what do you mean by "Answers on a postcard, please." And (since I'm REALLY dense right now), what does that excerpt mean? LOL, help!

What is it with these free Harlequins? I downloaded one a week or two ago - His Lady Mistress - and though it started out okay, in the prologue, the hero started making me gag in the first chapter or two. Did you read that one? It seemed very forced. Are these real, formerly published books?

[girlyswot.livejournal.com]

Yes, real books. This is what sells at Harlequin. I am too mean to pay actual money, so I only read the freebies, but these are all previously published and have been on sale for real money. I read His Lady Mistress and I did quite like it. You just have to be prepared to suspend all disbelief and normal judgment.

Cutter Smith, aka, Slash is apparently a spy. At the moment (I am in the middle of chapter two) he is chasing the heroine, a suspected double agent, round the French countryside. It is all highly unlikely and lots of fun. No idea why he's called Slash if it's not, apparently, a pun on his name. I'm pretty certain there isn't going to be any, um, slash. Hopefully all will be explained. I'll let you know.

Answers on a postcard is a British joke. TV shows (and especially one children's show) always used to ask for people entering competitions to send in their answers on a postcard.

[girlyswot.livejournal.com]

I've just got to the bit where the heroine disarms the Russian spy using her jewel-encrusted stilettos. Seriously. This is awesome.

[girlyswot.livejournal.com]

Oh, and you didn't comment on his scar. What do you think, O Expert?

[moonette1.livejournal.com]

The scar? I don't like it. It looks sort of weird. And definitely fake. I also don't like it because of the name along with the fact that I don't know anything about him except for the ridiculous name. You know the golden rule of scar admirers - it's not the scar, it's the entire package.

[moonette1.livejournal.com]

LOL, I should have used this icon, compliments of Berte.

[alkari.livejournal.com]

* Cutter is actually an assassin. Instead of Zorro's "Z" he leaves his victims with a "C".

* Cutter and office equipment do not go together. The results are invariably bloody, literally.

* His grandmother's pet chihauhau met a nasty end when it nipped him while he was trimming her garden hedges.

* He thinks the name makes him sound more exciting.

[gabrielladusult.livejournal.com]

Isn't the obvious that Cutter writes Snape/Malfoy fanfic?

[alkari.livejournal.com]

*shudders*. Even worse would be Dobby/Kreacher ...

[gabrielladusult.livejournal.com]

Well, I was trying to go for the most offensive coupling I could think of. But if the book was written pre-Harry Potter, it could be Hamlet/Horatio or Holmes/Watson or anything really, so long as it's 'slash'.

[ankaret.livejournal.com]

Maybe he's secretly this Slash.

Actually, I bet you anything you like he has a twin brother who was psychologically scarred because his girlfriend dumped him for being late to their wedding (even though he was actually busy rescuing disabled orphans and puppies from a house fire), and together they answer to 'Slash and Burn'.

[girlyswot.livejournal.com]

*loves* I bet there's a sequel featuring Burn. At least, I hope there is because after all that mysterious 'it's not about the name' stuff, there was no actual explanation for the nickname given at all. Talk about Chekhov's gun. I have only forgiven the author because the scene with the jewel-encrusted stilettos taking out the Russian spy was AWESOME.

[ankaret.livejournal.com]

Also, who calls their little boy Cutter? He'll grow up into either an emo kid or an elf.

[girlyswot.livejournal.com]

I vote elf.