girlyswot

Family meme

Tue, 17 Aug 2021 16:34:32 GMT

Or is it a Friday Five? Well, it’s Tuesday, so let’s say not.

1. Did you grow up with your parents together as a unit?
Yes. They are due to celebrate their golden wedding anniversary in a few weeks. If you ask my father about his wedding day, he will begin by telling you there was a very cool south-easterly breeze. This tells you everything you need to know about him.

2. Did you reach adulthood with four living grandparents?
I did not reach infancy with four living grandparents! My paternal grandfather died several years before I was born. My grandmother died in my early twenties. My maternal grandparents were considerably younger and died when I was in my thirties.

3. Is your extended family a close one or not?
Mixed, I would say. My brother is much better at it than I am. Last weekend my niece and nephew met their second cousin once removed, who is a similar age to them. There are some cousins we knew pretty well growing up, others who I’ve got to know a bit as grown ups and some I don’t know at all. I have one uncle I’ve barely met, but others who are very close.

4. Does your family have a 'black sheep'?
My great uncle. I did not know until long after he died that he was an alcoholic, a flasher and a paedophile.

5. What is your first memory of a family member that is not your mother(s) or father(s)?
I’m not sure. I have early memories of my grandparents, as well as the aunt and uncle who lived very close to us.

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Book meme!

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 19:23:46 GMT

Nicked from white_hart

Pick a number to get an answer from me. Or give your own answer to someone else's question. Or just borrow the meme!

I don’t actually know if I have answers to all of these, but I’ll try.

1. A book that haunts you

2. A book that was an interesting failure

3. A book where you really wanted to be reading the "shadow" version of the book (as in, there are traces of a different book in the work and you would have much preferred to read that one)

4. A book with a worldbuilding detail that has stuck with you

5. A book where you loved the premise but the execution left you cold

6. A book where you were dubious about the premise but loved the work

7. The most imaginative book you've seen lately

8. A book that feels like it was written just for you

9. A book that reminds you of someone

10. A book that belongs to a specific time in your mind, caught in amber

11. A book that came to you at exactly the right time

12. A book that came to you at the wrong time

13. A book with a premise you'd never seen before quite like that

14. A book balanced on a knife edge

15. A snuffed candle of a book

16. The one you'd take with you while you were being ferried on dark underground rivers

17. The one that taught you something about yourself

18. A book that went after its premise like an explosion

19. A book that started a pilgrimage

20. A frigid ice bath of a book

21. A book written into your psyche

22. A warm blanket of a book

23. A book that made you bleed

24. A book that asked a question you've never had an answer to

25. A book that answered a question you never asked

26. A book you recommend but cannot love

27. A book you love but cannot recommend

28. A book you adore that people are surprised by

29. A book that led you home

30. A book you detest that people are surprised by

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Victory is mine!

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 17:48:24 GMT

Bra-making has been a very long term goal of mine and I have had several unsuccessful attempts in the past. For most styles, fitting requires a lot more precision in both cutting and sewing than I can easily manage. Anyway, I have been admiring white_hart's lovely Banksia bralettes made from fun jersey colours and prints, and today I finally attempted my own.

Genuinely, I feel like Super Woman. At some point, I suppose I will have to take it off and I will attempt to photograph it then. It has spots and stripes and metallic fold-over elastic trim, and it is incredibly comfortable. I do plan to adjust the underarm slightly in future because it bags a little bit, but not enough not to wear this one as it is.

Details below for my reference:
B cup, narrow shoulder
Line with jersey
Powernet slings
Needs 2.5m FOE
and 1m band elastic.

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Funeral planning

Fri, 22 Jan 2021 00:00:35 GMT

I have spent this evening planning my funeral.

Not, I hasten to add, because there is anything wrong with me! As far as I know, this is an event which is not imminent. But we were talking about it on Christmas Day (cheery family that we are), and although my mother has provided us all with a detailed description of what she wants (a conversation which began with 'You'll need to book a double slot at the crematorium'), none of the rest of us really have a clue what the others would like. My father has been exempted on the basis that he doesn't much care, and my mother is very likely to outlive him and will actually enjoy planning his funeral.

I still have some admin to do on a list of who should be notified, where it should be announced online, and other information that would be useful for my executors and family to have. But the funeral planning was surprisingly fun. You will not be surprised to learn that I have strong views on what I do and do not want. In bold capitals I have written: NO EULOGY AND NO PHOTOS. They can have them at the wake if they want, but not in the church. I have specified bright colours for the flowers, but that no one is to be told what to wear. I have chosen proper hymns and they are not to be played in modernised versions with bits added and terrible tunes.

The readings will be: Song of Songs 8:6-7, Isaiah 25:6-9 and Revelation 21:1-27
The hymns are: For all the saints who from their labours rest; Love divine, all loves excelling; O the deep, deep love of Jesus; and From the Squalor of a Borrowed Stable.

The overall theme is the love that is stronger than death.

I am very pleased with this. Obviously I shall have to revisit it every so often, especially the notes on who could be asked to do what. But I think it is a service that conveys the things I most want people to be thinking about at my funeral, in a way that is particular and special to me.

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Plans

Sun, 01 Nov 2020 17:28:23 GMT

I knew I needed a plan for the new lockdown and I liked very much mountainkiss's post of lists, so I thought I would do something similar. I have divided it into 'lockdown plans', 'winter plans' and 'future plans'. Some are plans for selfcare to get through, others are goals to accomplish, or hopes and wishes which may or may not be possible. But one of the things I have struggled with in the last couple of months is the sense of not having anything to look forward to. I always feel a bit like that at this time of year with Christmas looming, but this year is particularly bad.

( All the plans )

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How I am

Fri, 24 Apr 2020 10:04:08 GMT

This was a comment on someone else's blog, but it seemed like it ought to be here too:

It’s not days, any more. It’s weeks and months. It’s not lockdown, it’s just life. It’s weird and it’s normal. It’s quiet and it’s hectic. It’s staying home except when it’s going out. It’s knowing things are scary and it’s not knowing how scary. It’s staying the same and it’s constantly changing. It’s impossible to process and yet we’re constantly processing it.

If you’re getting dressed every day, if everyone in your household is fed, it you’re doing the minimum that your work expects or requires, you’re winning.

My friend and work colleague who was hospitalised with coronavirus a few weeks ago is home and recovering. Others who’ve had it but more mildly at home all seem to be getting better. But a friend of a friend has now been in intensive care for nearly 4 weeks and it’s not looking good. Famous people who I am sad about are dying. Not famous people who I don’t know are dying. Health care workers are dying, and in the UK, very disproportionately health care workers from ethnic minorities are dying and no one knows why.

I’m sad and scared, and fine and happy, and getting on with life as usual, and coping and not coping. We’re making plans at work but we’re not making plans because we don’t know what plans to make.

And I’m about half way through The Mirror and The Light, though I have had some breaks for occasional romance reading along the way.

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Friday Five

Fri, 17 Apr 2020 19:32:32 GMT

1. What’s the weather outside your window doing right now?
It's windy. It's been windy all day, but mostly sunny, though it's now dark and I think it's raining a little bit, but I'm not going out to check.

2. What’s for breakfast? Lunch? Dinner?
Today it was raspberries and natural yoghurt for breakfast; king prawns and guacamole for lunch; leftover duck a l'orange, with roasted broccoli, and panna cotta for dinner.

3. What are things you can’t go without?
Sleep. Books. Quietness.

4. How did your parents choose your name?
They saw "As You Like It" when my mother was pregnant with me. I have always been profoundly grateful that it wasn't e.g. King Lear.

5. If you could travel back in time, where and when would you go?
I don't really want to go back any time before the invention of flush toilets, and when I do think about times I might enjoy, it tends to be for an experience of that period limited to a very tiny slice of the population. But I do think I would have enjoyed being a mediaeval abbess.*

*Of an actual abbey. Not in the Heyer-slang sense. I would be a terrible brothel-keeper.

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Quarantine meme

Wed, 15 Apr 2020 08:29:07 GMT

1. Are you an Essential Worker?
No, but I am working from home. From next week, I am planning to go into my office one day a week to do the things I can't do at home.

2. How many drinks have you had since the quarantine started?
I found a can of G&T at the back of the fridge, so I had that.

3. If you have kids... Are they driving you nuts?
I don't have kids.

4. What new hobby have you taken up during this?
( Read more... )

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Last time I...

Sun, 29 Mar 2020 10:09:29 GMT

Last time I traveled abroad: February! I went to Bruges for a long weekend and it was lovely and I am really, really glad I went then and didn't wait for slightly warmer weather.

Last time I slept in a hotel: February, in Bruges. I got a really good deal booking the hotel with Eurostar, and it was much swankier than I was expecting.

Last time I flew in a plane: September 2019, for an art holiday in Portugal

Last time I took a train: Work meeting in Watford a couple of weeks ago. Had it been a day later, we probably would have switched to an online meeting.

Last time I took public transport: Ditto.

Last time I had a house guest: I think it might have been six years ago? I don't have a spare room or bed, so if someone comes to stay, I have to go and sleep at my brother's next door. It's a bit of a palaver.

Last time I got my hair cut: Eighteen months ago, maybe? I mostly cut it myself and I think I last did it three or four months ago. It's probably about time I had another go at it.

Last time I went to the pictures: Little Women back in January.

Last time I went to the theatre: A couple of years ago, to see Vincent and Flavia's most recent tango show. It was excellent.

Last time I went to a concert: December, to see my godson playing in his orchestra. His mother had organised our tickets... for the wrong night! Anyway, we waiting until the interval and were then able to get some returns, which worked really well because we got to see his bit, but could sit out in the foyer and chat during the first half when he wasn't playing.

Last time I went to an art museum: I went to several in Bruges, including the Salvador Dali museum.

Last time I sat down in a restaurant: Similarly, in Bruges.

Last time I went to a party: My father had a big party for his 80th birthday last May.

Last time I played a board game: Settlers of Catan. Not sure when but I quite often play it when I'm staying with friends in Bridgend, when I go down for work.

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Space

Thu, 19 Mar 2020 00:34:17 GMT

Earlier this week, things started to get real in a new way, at least from my perspective. I know for some of you this all kicked in much earlier. But Tuesday was when work suddenly became full of cancelling, planning, re-scheduling, moving online, and working out contingencies on minimal information. I found myself getting sucked in to constant checking of news updates. Every group on Facebook was full of endless discussions around different implications or scenarios which no one had answers to. And there was, if not actual panic, measurable anxiety.

I needed to find some space. Not from people, but from the headlines, the clickbait, the panic and the scaremongering. I needed to limit my consumption to actual news, and that only at specific tmes.

So I made a Facebook group that would be virus-free. It's called Space and it's here and it has been wonderful. Joyous, even. This is what I just posted there:

Thanks for another great day! It's been really fun seeing people from different parts of my life (and some not from my life at all!) connecting over a shared love of The West Wing or Cabin Pressure, Pickled Onion Monster Munch or cat videos, crochet and poetry, and all the other good things in life.

This is a virus-free space, but that doesn't mean it has to be a relentlessly upbeat space. It's okay if you need it to be somewhere to post about the normal frustrations, worries and sorrows of life. I hope it can be a kind space and a gentle space.

It has been reminding me a bit of Live Journal back in the day, actually. I've been excited to keep checking back and see what new threads have been started and who's commented on existing ones. I know most of you don't know each other, and it will take a while to build the kind of trust and community that LJ was so good at fostering, but I'd love to see bits of that starting to happen too.

And once again, a reminder that if you know someone who might need this space, please do invite them.

If you need a space right now, you are very welcome to join us.

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Little Women

Sun, 09 Feb 2020 20:23:05 GMT

The last film I saw in the cinema was The Artist in 2012. And, to be honest, I don't think I've watched more than half a dozen films on DVD or TV since then either. I was going to go to Little Women over Christmas, and then I was put off by a couple of things, and then someone else said they thought I'd enjoy it, and anyway I went. I probably shouldn't have bothered after all.

I genuinely have no idea if it's a good film or not. I cannot imagine what the experience of watching it without knowing the books intimately is like. I don't even know whether it would make any sense at all. It's told in a very weird fashion with two alternating timelines one of which is more or less Little Women, and the other more or less Good Wives. It felt to me a bit like the Facebook highlights of someone's life, thrown together with Facebook's usual carelessness with respect to chronology. I certainly never knew what was coming next.

Obviously, like all films, it's massively simplified. You have to make choices. But the choices made will determine what story it is you're telling. And Greta Gerwig wanted to tell a story mostly about writing. It's Jo's story, of course, as the books are Jo's story too. But in the books, Jo's story is part of a bigger story about being a family and being a Christian. In the films, there was something of the family and none of the faith. The film began and ended with scenes about her writing, however. At the beginning she's selling a story to a newspaper, and at the end the family are celebrating the publication of her first book, rather than Marmee's birthday. The book, of course, is Little Women.

UGH UGH UGH. This was one of the things I knew about which put me off. I hate it when female authors are identified with their heroines. It never happens to male authors (that I can think of). Jo March is not Louisa May Alcott, and Jo's story is weakened if you try to make it so. Jo didn't need the publisher's daughters to demand he publish her book (I believe for Alcott it was the publisher's niece). It's also pretty patronising to Alcott, to suggest that she's only capable of writing books about herself and her own experiences, rather than creating characters like other authors do.

So there's that. I also found myself railing against the de-Christianisation of the book. There was no reference to Pilgrim's Progress, to the Bibles given as Christmas presents, to Father's role as a chaplain in the army (he does marry Meg and John, but other than that you wouldn't know he was ordained). Even when Beth had scarlet fever, and when she's dying, no one prays. Worst of all, the scene where they take breakfast to the Hummels has people in the background going to church. As if to say not only that it's better to care for the poor than go to church, but somehow that those two activities are mutually exclusive, rather than, as in the book, the Marches caring for others because of their faith.

There were good things. Saoirse Ronan is really excellent. The scenes I liked best were the younger girls fighting. I genuinely felt like there was a real family, loving each other even while they angered and frustrated and irritated each other.

There were annoying things. Like, if you're going to have Professor Bhaer telling Jo his hands are empty, and her replying 'Not empty now', you have to have her actually put her hands in his. THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT OF THAT SCENE. I felt like they completely botched Laurie and Amy's story. And I really needed Professor Bhaer to have seen something of Jo's writing to give him a reason to visit, rather than just randomly turning up. Oh, and the worst thing of all, we're told that Jo has refused Laurie within about ten minutes of the film starting. I mean, I know she refuses him, but why wouldn't you let me keep hoping for an hour or two? Weird.

In general you could tell that Gerwig had tried hard to use dialogue from the book. But films are just different. And this film felt like it didn't trust its viewers to understand it at all. Everything was spoken. Everything was underlined and highlighted. This was where the dual timeline felt incredibly patronising. Yes, we get that Beth is ill twice. And that both times Jo is looking after her. And the first time she lives but the second time she doesn't. Do they really think we wouldn't have remembered that and noticed the parallels if you'd given us the story chronologically?

I cried, practically throughout the whole thing, but honestly I don't think it was because of the film. I think it was that the film kept having moments which reminded me of the books, and the books make me cry. I was reliving a whole lot in my head that never appeared on screen, and it matters to me. These are people I've known and loved for 30 years but, sadly, this was not their story.

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STITCHFIX

Sat, 01 Feb 2020 12:21:40 GMT

I have been enjoying watching Youtube videos of people unboxing all kinds of subscriptions, and clothes subscriptions have always intrigued me. Stitchfix has been around for a while in the US, and I'm not sure how recently, but is now available in the UK. It goes from sizes 6-18 and since I have recently lost some weight, I decided to risk it and try a box at size 18. The BIG exciting news for me is that everything fitted, more or less. Not everything was flattering, but everything went on my body and did up, which I was not confident would be the case.

You get to fill in a style profile - a mix of multiple choice questions, picking photos of items and outfits that you like, and a final comment box to add any other information. It wasn't as lengthy as I was expecting, but it did give you a good chance to talk about whether you were looking for casual/smart/formal clothes, give some indication of your usual preferences, and say whether you wanted safer/more adventurous choices. You also indicate your price range (I picked the lowest).

There is a £10 fee for the box, which is offset against the price of any items you choose to keep. If you keep the whole lot, there's a 20% discount. You can pick your preferred delivery day. Mine came via Royal Mail with a prepaid delivery label, so I just have to put any returned items back in the box, stick on the label, and drop it off at a Post Office within a week.

If you'd like to try it, using this link in the next 48 hours will give you (and also me), £25 credit.

So, here's what they sent, what I thought of it, and what, if anything, I'm keeping.

( Read more... )

So I'll send the returns back next week. You get to give feedback on all the items and you can ask for the same stylist again, so that they get to know your preferences over time, I guess. I have set up an 'on demand' subscription, so they won't automatically send me more boxes, but if I want to do it again, all the info will be there. I might. I tried things from shops I wouldn't normally, and from brands I hadn't heard of, and although the one I'm keeping is from a familiar brand, I would definitely be interested in trying some of the others again. It also made me try shapes and styles I don't normally, and some worked much better than I would have thought.

I am still losing weight so my size and shape is changing. I think this is quite a good way to see what clothes I might want to wear as that continues. I'm also thinking I might try a Lookiero box, which is a similar thing but based in Europe.

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One Hour Friday Five

Sat, 16 Nov 2019 14:54:11 GMT

1. What could you do for an hour or so today that you would really enjoy doing?
Watch Roger Federer play tennis.

2. What could you do for an hour today that might improve your life in the future?
I ought to go round the outside of the house with wire wool and a sealant, looking for the gap where the rat got into my attic. I never want that to happen again.

3. What could you do for an hour today that could strengthen or improve a skill you have?
Paint watercolour hexagons and stripes.

4. What could you do for an hour today that would make your living space more pleasant to live in?
I need to do the washing up.

5. What could you do for an hour today that would improve your relationships with loved ones?

DM with F about Strictly.

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Friday five

Fri, 10 May 2019 14:01:22 GMT

1. What made you smile this week?
Art class started again this morning so that always makes me smile.

2. What ingredients make a perfect Saturday?
My best Saturdays are the ones with nothing in the diary, and no people that I have to talk to. Then for a truly perfect Saturday, I would have done the housework on Friday, but usually I do spend an hour or so cleaning and washing up on Saturday morning. Otherwise, I would spend the time in the craft hut, sewing or painting. It would be sunny and warm, so I might do a little light gardening, and also just some sitting outside reading. If I felt like it I would go and visit somewhere fun like an art exhibition or a lovely garden, and stop for a nice cup of tea and a slice of cake. And then, obviously, for the PERFECT Saturday, I would then meet up with my professional dance partner for our performance on Strictly...

3. What is the best thing you ever had for dessert? Share the memory or the recipe.
There are very few desserts I haven't enjoyed. I can't think of one that stands out as particularly special.

4. What is your favorite memory of your mom, or your favorite thing about being a mom?
Taking her shopping for an outfit for her to wear at my brother's wedding was a good memory. We had some good conversations about why she has such hang-ups about her appearance and then the personal shopper brought some beautiful clothes for her to try on. She cried, 'because she didn't think she deserved to wear things like that' and then tried everything on and bought the best things which really looked fabulous on her. I was glad to have done that for her.

5. What are your plans for the summer?
I'm not taking any annual leave in July or August, but I am going on holiday at the very end of August for a week with some of my art group and also alithea . We are going to a villa in Portugal to do a printmaking workshop. I have high hopes for this!

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History five!

Fri, 03 May 2019 21:07:03 GMT

Is there a particular historical period or event, anywhere in the world, that fascinates you?>
Most history is fascinating, I think. Except the battles which are utterly tedious. I am more interested in what people's lives were like than the big political issues of the day which is why I am a fan of things like Victorian Farm. And of course I am also interested in church history. If by 'interested' we mean 'in the middle of writing 8 lectures on it'. Right now I'm working on the transition period from the New Testament church to the early church, so I guess I would say that.

Would you like to visit that time, or live in it permanently, or does the whole idea make you want to run screaming?
I generally prefer to live in the era of flush toilets and mass vaccination, so in practice I think I would hate it. Time-travel is not my superpower of choice. But there are people I would love to talk to and things I'd like to ask, so maybe a brief visit?

>What's the best piece of historical writing, nonfiction or fiction, you've ever read?
Wolf Hall and Bring Up The Bodies. Just stunning writing and exploration of a complex character in a historical situation I thought I understood pretty well. Impatiently awaiting the last book in the series.

>What's the worst?
Oh, that's easy, it's the Julia Quinn historical romance I once read. Amongst the many howlers, she had decimal currency in Regency England.

Is there a historical site you would love to visit?
I would love to do a lengthy private cruise around the Mediterranean visiting all the historical sites. When I win the lottery, obviously.*

*I don't do the lottery, so as Linda Smith once said, that means I am marginally less likely to win it than people who do.

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Archive Friday Five on growing up.

Sat, 27 Apr 2019 11:12:49 GMT

1. Do you remember when you were first addressed as sir or ma'am?
In America, I expect, so that would be in 2006 when I was 34. There were so many weird things about the way people spoke, though, that I can't say that one was especially memorable. I do remember being a bit freaked out by children addressing me as 'Miss Ros', which I still don't like because (a) it makes me feel about 104 and (b) it's too close to being called Miss or Miss Clarke.

Which, obviously, I was called when I was a teacher, and in that context felt fairly normal after the first half an hour or so. But one of the main reasons I left teaching was because I felt it was turning me into a bully and I didn't want to be that person. So I really don't like it when something brings back those feelings.

My formal address of choice is, of course, Doctor. Dr Clarke or Dr Ros are both acceptable.

2. Do you remember when you first realized the difference between being childish and childlike?
No.

3. Do you remember the first time you realized you were more adult than child?
I mean, there's still a big streak of child inside me. There's a ton of things I think grown ups should know and be able to do that I can't. And I was always fiercely independent as a child, exacerbated by boarding school from an early age. I was 17 when I went to university, so there wasn't even a big sense that anything changed when I turned 18, to be honest. I find it quite hard to identify any clear dividing line between childhood and adulthood.

4. Do you remember your first taste of major independence?
See above. One thing which sticks out a bit was renting my first flat to live in on my own, I suppose. Previously I'd been in shared houses with friends, or accommodation provided by a job. Going to the letting agents, signing the contract, sorting out utilities and so on, moving to a part of the country I didn't know at all, all on my own, that felt a bit scary.

5. Do you remember what you bought with your first paycheck?
First summer job was waitressing in a local pub. I think I actually saved most of it, but I don't know what I then spent it on.

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Friday five

Fri, 19 Apr 2019 20:25:22 GMT

1. Did you enjoy your senior year of high school?
Yes. I was at a boarding school and in the last year we had significantly more independence, which I liked a lot. I mostly cooked all my own meals, for instance, and went for long walks on the hills when I had free afternoons. I had some nice friends and I found A-levels really pretty easy, so I did not do a lot of work. Also I had an unconditional university offer, which helped. Plus, I like doing exams and between mocks and A-levels (of which I did 5), there were a lot of exams.

2. Did you have a senior trip (high school) and were you able to go on it?
I don't think I went on any residential trips with school and I'm pretty sure we didn't have any day trips in U6, because of all the exams and university interviews and so on. I did have four interviews, at least two of which involved staying overnight.

3. Was graduating (from either high school or college/university) a big thing with your family or just another day?
Obviously I did not graduate from school because I was not at school in America. The last two days of the summer term were always the same: Sports Day (vile horror) and concert; church service, lunch, prize giving. Parents could come for all of it. Usually my father picked me up from school and if I'd won a prize he would come for the lunch and prize giving. In my last year, my mother came instead (my father went to my brother's school that year). It was a slightly bigger deal in the final year with a special tea and things. I won two prizes (physics and maths).

My university graduation was on a freezing and wet January day. The Oxford ceremony involves going outside halfway through, to change into your new gowns. We all came back in dripping wet, which is not a good look for a white-fur-trimmed hood. I hadn't planned to have graduation photos but my mum really wanted them, so my dad and I organised it in secret as a surprise for her. Except black and white are NOT my colours at the best of times, and cold and wet was not the best of times. I honestly look like I've died. She nobly still has the photo on display in their bedroom, but not anywhere other people have to look at it.

I graduated in absentia for my other degrees.

4. What were you looking forward to the most after graduating from either high school or college/university?
Well, after school I was most looking forward to university. After finishing university (not graduating, which didn't happen for another 8 months) I did not have a job and I was panicking a bit. I didn't really have anything specific to look forward to.

5. Knowing what you know now, what advice would you give your graduating self?
I would tell myself going up to university that although you'll find the first year fairly straightforward, it will get harder in the second year. This is not the moment to just stop doing any work. You can, in fact, do this, and it will be a lot easier on you if you don't wait until six weeks before finals to try and cram in everything from second and third year. Also, when Dr Jones tells you not to worry about the special papers, do not listen. You still need to pass those papers. Oh, and don't get too invested in Eldorado. It gets cancelled in less than a year.

I would tell myself leaving university that it all works out in the end. Just do the next right thing as it comes up, and trust God with the outcome.

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Five questions on Saturday

Sat, 09 Mar 2019 20:46:49 GMT

1. Are we losing the art of listening?
I don't think so. Plenty of people listen to TED talks and audiobooks. Radio isn't going away despite the arrival of the videostar. Listening in conversation is a slightly different thing. Some people are excellent at it and others aren't. Possibly some people would be better if they weren't constantly distracted by their phones, though I suspect that those same people would just have been distracted by other things before phones, so.

2. Have you ever interacted with the police?
I once left my handbag on a bench and someone had handed it in.
I also once had my bike stolen. The thief discarded it not far from the station where I'd left it. Someone found it and handed it in to the police, who asked whether they wanted to keep it if it wasn't claimed. They did not. I almost didn't bother going to collect it myself. It was not a good bike.
That's it, I think.

3. Do you like being alone?
YES. I need to make sure I don't go for more than 2 or 3 days on my own, because it's not good for my mental health, but I never get lonely in my own company. I like the quiet, both actual and metaphorical.

4. Who would you share your passwords with?
I would not. Though every so often I do wonder whether I should have a way of someone accessing some of my social media in the event of my death so as to let people know. But I haven't done anything about it.

5. What are you grateful for today?
I am grateful for no significant traffic jams on the M5/M6 interchange where the roadworks are and I am grateful for a really well-organised and educational OCA study day and for the chance to meet other students and look at each other's work.

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Food shopping

Fri, 15 Feb 2019 20:43:44 GMT

1. Do you make up a dinner plan for the coming week?
I generally plan lunches and dinners, and have the same thing for breakfast every day. This usually happens on Friday afternoons.

2. Do you make up a shopping list and stick to it when shopping?
Mostly, yes.

3. What is one thing that you always buy, but never put down on a list?
I don't have anything that never goes on a list. If I need or want it, I put it on the list.

4. Is there anything that you always think you are out of and come home with it to discover you already have a year’s supply on hand?
My house eats sellotape and batteries, so I always think I have a year's supply (or more!) but apparently never do. I don't think there's anything the other way round. I did once end up with 4 jars of ground ginger but that wasn't my fault.

5. Do you get your groceries delivered?
No, I go to the shop and buy them. I have done click and collect a couple of times and I have had food shopping delivered when I've been on self-catering holidays. Mostly I don't trust other people to make decisions for me. This is how I ended up with all the ground ginger, so I feel my point is proved.

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Five on Saturday on sleep

Sat, 09 Feb 2019 11:05:55 GMT

1. What size (twin, full, etc.) is your bed?
It is a 3" single. There aren't many things I would change about my tiny house, but I would love to have a bedroom big enough for a larger bed. It is such a treat whenever I get to sleep in a bigger bed when I go away. Sadly, however, it is a choice between having a wardrobe or having a bigger bed, and the wardrobe is the main storage in the whole house and could not possibly go anywhere else because of the sloping ceiling.

2. How many pillows do you sleep with?
Two, though I never feel like I have got the right pillow set up. I think maybe I want one firm and one squishy one. At the moment I have two squishy ones.

3. Do you have a weighted blanket? If so, does it help you?
No, and I think I would hate it. I like to be able to move a lot while I'm sleeping. I can't manage sheets and blankets tucked in, for example, and generally have at least one leg stuck out of the duvet.

4. Do you sleep with any stuffed animals?
Not since I was about 10, no.

5. Do you have to have the TV on to go to sleep?
I'm not saying I never fall asleep in front of the TV, but there is no TV in the bedroom, no radio, and it is very rare for there to be a phone or computer in there. I have the kindle and an alarm clock and that's it. It is rare for me to go to sleep without reading a bit first, though it is not impossible.

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Thursday meme

Thu, 24 Jan 2019 19:56:58 GMT

( Pomegranate, pineapple and a pylon )

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Friday five

Fri, 21 Dec 2018 23:22:12 GMT

1. Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas – which one do you use?
Happy Christmas.

2. Do you own an ugly Christmas sweater?
No.

3. Do you celebrate the Winter Solstice?
No.

4. Now that you are ‘in the know,’ what would you leave out for St. Nick on the 24th?
Since what I know is that he's NOT REAL, why would I leave anything out?

5. Tired of the snow and icky weather yet? For those fortunate folks in the other hemisphere, are you tired of the humidity and hot weather?
Yes. I mean, we haven't had any snow yet and I will be more than happy for that to continue. It's grey and rainy a lot at the moment, though, which I'm also not enjoying.

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Friday five: books!

Sat, 15 Dec 2018 23:45:53 GMT

1. Do you enjoy receiving books as holiday or birthday gifts?
Not fiction, tbh. If I want to read it, I've almost certainly read it, and if I haven't, I'll want to have it on my kindle anyway. But non-fiction books with pictures are often excellent gifts: art, textiles, even recipe books and the like.

2. What book are you reading (or, what is the last book you read)?
Natalie Anderson's Awakening His Innocent Cinderella was last night's choice. I quite liked it. Relatively low angst M&B. Anderson used to write for the now extinct Modern Heat/Modern Extra/Riva line and you can tell that in her Moderns.

I'm also partway through Hannah Anderson's (no relation, I assume), All That's Good.

3. Are you enjoying (or, did you enjoy) that book? Why or why not?
See above for Natalie Anderson's.

I think I'm enjoying All That's Good, but there has been quite a long hiatus. I'm just about ready to get back to some regular non-fiction. I try to read a chapter of non-fiction before my nightly fiction-fix but I fell out of the habit when work got crazy busy a few months ago.

4. About how many books do you read in an average year?
So far this year it's about 250. I think that's probably about normal.

5. What are some of the books on your to-read pile (or list)
Lethal White
Echoes of Exodus
But mostly, I don't keep long TBR lists. I buy books as I read them.

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I have measured out my holidays in cups of tea

Sat, 03 Nov 2018 15:32:57 GMT

In the summer, I went away for 3 days, to a nice hotel in Wales. I ate delicious food, cycled round a lake, sat in the spa pool, and tried not to worry too much about work, mostly helped by having even worse internet than I do at home. I also discovered Morgan's Brew Tea, which I promptly ordered off the internet when I got back home and am drinking right now. It is seriously yummy.

Last week, I went to Malta/Gozo for 7 nights. I was extremely tired and what I wanted most of all was rest. I wanted an easy week of nice food, nice weather, nice spa pool, nice beach, lots of sleep, no thinking about work. I did not get that week.

I am much less tired than I was a week ago, so the main objective of the holiday was achieved. This is the big headline and I am reminding myself of it regularly, because there were a lot of minor objectives that were not really achieved, or not without quite a lot more effort than I wanted to give them. There were a lot of disappointing things about the week: the weather was mostly not great; the jacuzzi at the B&B wasn't working; the breakfasts at the B&B were limited in both variety and quantity; food in general ranged from okay to fine, and was on some occasions quite difficult to source at all; the two beaches I visited were both fine but not spectacular and required either a longish scary walk, or two buses and a walk. I did sleep fairly well and that was a very good thing.

The single biggest issue was that I lost my kindle on the first day, somewhere between the airport and the B&B. Yes, I have the kindle app on my phone, and on my netbook. Yes, I had taken one paper book with me (I nearly didn't and that really would have been awful). Yes, there were a couple of bookshops with a limited selection of English books. But. None of them are my kindle, with about 1600 carefully curated books, including about 10 that I'd been saving up to read on holiday. None of them have the same combination of battery life, easy on the eye, portability and choice. There was one book which I tried reading on my phone and had to stop because the experience was actually ruining a book that I think I would otherwise enjoy a lot. I did manage some on the phone. The newest Sarah Morgan came out on Thursday and I more or less read it non-stop. Nothing can stop me enjoying her books, apparently. I did enjoy the paper book a friend had lent me, The Keeper of Lost Things, and also two that I bought: Catherine Alliott's Wish You Were Here, and Sally Thorne's The Hating Game. I bought a third, The Wardrobe Mistress, but didn't get into it and decided to donate it to the B&B library instead.

So it wasn't that I didn't have anything to read. But it was hard work. And that was how the whole holiday felt. Everything was hard work. Getting to the beach was hard. Finding places to eat was hard. Visiting places which claimed to be 'open daily', but were actually shut on whatever day I went was hard. Swimming in the unheated pool in strong winds and/or grey drizzle was hard.

Not having a drinkable cup of tea for a week was hard. I think it was mostly the milk, and a bit the water. Water on Malta and Gozo is desalinated seawater and it's perfectly safe to drink, but not that nice. The tea was revolting. And so then I ended up drinking bought things - sometimes water, sometimes fruit juice or fizzy drinks - and not really drinking enough at all as a result. One small bonus was finding that Italian San Pellegrino Aranciata does not have artificial sweeteners in it, unlike the UK equivalent.

After three quite difficult days, I worked out that I needed to take action if I was going to have a chance of feeling rested and relaxed. Initially I googled for spa days, but in the end I moved to a different hotel for the last two nights. It wasn't perfect, but it helped a lot. I barely went out for the time I was there, since it was mostly raining. I swam in the grown-ups only roof top pool, which was cold, but lovely. I swam a bit in the downstairs family pool, which was warm but usually had children in it. I sat in the jacuzzi and had long baths in the gloriously vast and comfortable tub in my room. I ate vast quantities at breakfast and found a nice supermarket for buying picnic food to eat in my room for other meals. Even while I was there, I had to have maintenance come twice for a broken toilet seat and bath plug.

I don't know if I like Malta and Gozo. I am not rushing to return, but most of what was disappointing was circumstantial. I would not go there expecting to have a beach holiday, or for the food, both of which are quite important to me. There's also a huge British ex-pat culture, which is not my favourite thing. But I suspect that if it had been sunnier and less windy and rainy, and if I had not lost my kindle, I would have liked it a lot better. I like visiting places where I can sit and sketch, and there were a lot of places I could have done that in better weather. I didn't go to the ancient temples, for instance, and I would probably have enjoyed them. I didn't visit Valletta, and I think I might have liked to.

There are two big things to learn from this holiday, I think:
1. ALWAYS CHECK YOU HAVE YOUR KINDLE WHEN GETTING OFF PUBLIC TRANSPORT.

2. Trust your instinct. I'd thought about Malta for a holiday a few times, and never quite been convinced that I'd really like it. This time round, I'd also been looking at Crete, and I think that might well have been a better choice after all. But, to be honest, next time I want a holiday on a Mediterranean island, I think I'll go back to Ischia. Not in November, though.

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Sunday Friday Five: apples!

Sun, 21 Oct 2018 14:09:02 GMT

1. Have you ever bobbed for apples?
I don't think so, but it's possible that I did as a child.

2. Do you like a regular or hard apple cider?
So. I do like alcohol cider, especially French cider. But I also really, really, really like Starbucks hot caramel apple cider, though they don't sell it here, so I haven't had it for years.

3. Do you have a special type of apple that you prefer over others?
I've been eating Jazz apples lately, which are fine. I love an Egremont Russet.

4. Have you ever made baked apples?
Oh yes, often. Yum.

5. Who is the apple of your eye?
You are.

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